Flannel shirts, skinny jeans and True Colors

You with the sad eyes

don't be discouraged

5 months is a long time to be away and a significant amount of time to be traveling through foreign lands without stopping for more than a few days. i have been back in my home country for almost a month and am feeling a bit more at ease with the world around me (and my place in it) than when i first arrived. i can walk through a grocery store, restaurant and public setting without a flurry of thoughts and images bombarding my senses. i no longer marvel at the size everything or the quick pace at which our society moves. even my meltdowns or shutdowns, as the case may be, have decreased to a less embarrassing number.

oh I realize

it's hard to take courage

now i trip instead of fall.

it is the so called "little things" that cause me to stop mid-run or stare too long out the window or put down my computer or take a deep breath. it is the push to buy buy buy because there are holiday sales. it is the fear that i am losing my language capabilities. it is the realization that snow is on the mountains because it is WINTER. it is the recognition that i can take a hot shower whenever i want. it is the expectation that a car is necessary in this town.

it is the question, "so you are getting back to real life huh?"

in a world full of people

you can lose sight of it all

and the darkness still inside you

can make you feel so small

missing the act of traveling was expected. the longing to experience new cultures and meet new people continues unabated. the missed connections, phone calls and decrease in email has resulted in the painful realization that the distance, both physical and existential, may deter and possibly derail new found relationships and has led to sleepless nights and the inability to express myself in any language.

but i see your true colors

shining through

i see your true colors

and thats why i love you

so don't be afraid to let them show

your true colors

true colors

are beautiful like a rainbow

there are those who are patient, those who understand or try to anyway. those who see something is different and help me to understand or just be with the difference. there are those who want to hear about my experiences or who want to share their own or who don't want anything at all. there are those who work really hard to connect, sending messages so we can schedule a time to catch up as our lives or timezones don't quite seem to match up. there are strangers who smile as you go by, children who laugh at the wind and puppies that bark at your foot. each instance reminds me of the beauty of the moment.

show me a smile then

don't be unhappy

can't remember when i last saw you laughing

if this worlds makes you crazy

and you've taken all you can bear

you call me up because you know i'll be there

i never thought much about the importance of pop culture in our society; a week ago i realized the 5 month gap can cause a ripple of pop culture-related shocks. all of a sudden the fashion world raided my 10th grade closet and the soundtrack of my adolescence was being sung by a group of tweens awaiting their frappaccinos at Starbucks. it appears the ongoing effect of media on how we identify ourselves, and thus how we relate and live our lives means i missed 5 months of talked about tweets, tv shows, songs, movies, food, material goods, personalities and other topics that caught the attention of my friends and family. my much needed and desired media blackout has some negative effects after all. can i get a pop cultural guidance counselor please?

but i see your true colors

shining through

i see your true colors

and thats why i love you

so don't be afraid to let them show

your true colors

true colors

are beautiful like a rainbow.