Nola in December

i find myself walking along a treelined street that boasts homes on the National Historic Registry at every turn. As i look above at the clear blue sky i notice the beads that hang as jewels from the trees, hundreds of them sway in the breeze and sparkle as the sun hits them just right. the streetcar passes at an appropriate southern pace and i wonder again how it happened that i am in New Orleans.

according to the locals it is cool for this time of year, usually it would be in the 60s, but for a few days, the days i happen to be here it is only inching towards 50. with a blue sky and bright sun i can forgive the lack of warmth and revel in being outside without the thought of an umbrella or raincoat. to be clear, i own neither so while i may think of using them in San Francisco or Oregon, i will not. instead i opt for withdrawing indoors or getting wet.

passing the time in the hotel sitting room i listen to the many languages being spoken, admire the architecture of this cerca 1800s building, and ponder the people that have sat in this same antique chair. it is a luxury as a traveler to have the time to sit and just take it all in, at least it is for me. there is no better way to get to know a place than to watch and listen to the people as they go about their daily activities. certainly museums and tours can tell you a lot, but so can just being in the moment with people, and the locale doesn't really matter.

and so today alone i will exchange my antique chair for a seat at a local lunch hangout, a park bench, a church pew, a bar stool, and finally a chair on the veranda.

more travel but this time to familiar places

hours ago I arrived back in the big city I have called home for the last 10 years. It has been about 7 months since I was last here. 7 months, 5 countries, hundreds of new friends, and infinite experiences later it feels as though I never left. I do not like this feeling. Best described, it denies the existence of the last 7 months and it shows how easy it would be to return to my life before.

Of course that is not quite true. I cannot return to what once was, nor would I want to. That being said, it is there, that sense, that feeling and I must reiterate, i do not like it. I did not anticipate this feeling AND am not surprised by it. in fact, it is comforting to observe it in action.

Flannel shirts, skinny jeans and True Colors

You with the sad eyes

don't be discouraged

5 months is a long time to be away and a significant amount of time to be traveling through foreign lands without stopping for more than a few days. i have been back in my home country for almost a month and am feeling a bit more at ease with the world around me (and my place in it) than when i first arrived. i can walk through a grocery store, restaurant and public setting without a flurry of thoughts and images bombarding my senses. i no longer marvel at the size everything or the quick pace at which our society moves. even my meltdowns or shutdowns, as the case may be, have decreased to a less embarrassing number.

oh I realize

it's hard to take courage

now i trip instead of fall.

it is the so called "little things" that cause me to stop mid-run or stare too long out the window or put down my computer or take a deep breath. it is the push to buy buy buy because there are holiday sales. it is the fear that i am losing my language capabilities. it is the realization that snow is on the mountains because it is WINTER. it is the recognition that i can take a hot shower whenever i want. it is the expectation that a car is necessary in this town.

it is the question, "so you are getting back to real life huh?"

in a world full of people

you can lose sight of it all

and the darkness still inside you

can make you feel so small

missing the act of traveling was expected. the longing to experience new cultures and meet new people continues unabated. the missed connections, phone calls and decrease in email has resulted in the painful realization that the distance, both physical and existential, may deter and possibly derail new found relationships and has led to sleepless nights and the inability to express myself in any language.

but i see your true colors

shining through

i see your true colors

and thats why i love you

so don't be afraid to let them show

your true colors

true colors

are beautiful like a rainbow

there are those who are patient, those who understand or try to anyway. those who see something is different and help me to understand or just be with the difference. there are those who want to hear about my experiences or who want to share their own or who don't want anything at all. there are those who work really hard to connect, sending messages so we can schedule a time to catch up as our lives or timezones don't quite seem to match up. there are strangers who smile as you go by, children who laugh at the wind and puppies that bark at your foot. each instance reminds me of the beauty of the moment.

show me a smile then

don't be unhappy

can't remember when i last saw you laughing

if this worlds makes you crazy

and you've taken all you can bear

you call me up because you know i'll be there

i never thought much about the importance of pop culture in our society; a week ago i realized the 5 month gap can cause a ripple of pop culture-related shocks. all of a sudden the fashion world raided my 10th grade closet and the soundtrack of my adolescence was being sung by a group of tweens awaiting their frappaccinos at Starbucks. it appears the ongoing effect of media on how we identify ourselves, and thus how we relate and live our lives means i missed 5 months of talked about tweets, tv shows, songs, movies, food, material goods, personalities and other topics that caught the attention of my friends and family. my much needed and desired media blackout has some negative effects after all. can i get a pop cultural guidance counselor please?

but i see your true colors

shining through

i see your true colors

and thats why i love you

so don't be afraid to let them show

your true colors

true colors

are beautiful like a rainbow.

Photo of the day...Suchitoto, El Salvador

A small colonial city in central El Salvador, Suchitoto was the little surprise you hope for as a traveler. in all honesty, El Salvador was the greatest surprise of my trip. i wanted to like it, i wanted to prove all those people wrong who told me to avoid it because of danger and history and poverty. what i saw, what i experienced was something very different and i didn't have to work to like it. the country and the people welcomed me and i would have had to work really hard to dislike it, and even then i don't think that would have been possible.

In Suchitoto i found a hostel that overlooked Lake Suchitoto and was run by a friendly local family. ok so the hostel was small and the sleeping area cramped, but the location was great and the owners genuinely want travelers to get to know their city and their country. this sentiment, the hope that foreigners will come and get to know the country and culture beyond the negativity and violence which is presented in the media, was prevalent in almost everyone i met in El Salvador. in Suchitoto, people recommended local artists, a visit to the church, local food, a boat ride on the lake, and a hike to the waterfall.

Ah the waterfall, a natural geometric masterpiece. the basalt blocks are in fact hexagonal and during the rainy season (the time of my visit) water rushed and fell with astounding speed. my pictures do not capture the beauty or power; as was the case throughout my trip, somethings could never be captured by a camera and must be held in my memory alone. as a friend and i walked through the outskirts of the town to get here, we were welcomed and directed by locals proud to help us to see 'Los Tercios'. imagine my happiness at discovering that this waterfall was on the land of a local farmer who welcomed us to walk down to the falls and then walk beyond to a marvelous view of the valley and the lake.

the above photo is from one of the streets off of the main plaza near the hostel, you can see the lake in the distance. this street is typical for this town and there were many others that were nearly identical, they even had horses grazing!

changing of the leaves

the act of running brings me closer to myself than anything else i do throughout the day. it is in that time that i feel most alive and am able to observe the world as closely as i was able to experience it when i was traveling.

as the leaves twist and turn in the breeze, making their descent to the cool, damp grass i am finally able to feel that it is indeed autumn and that the natural world is shifting, preparing for the change to come. my understanding of time changed as i traveled through countries and cultures that measure, follow and play with "time" in ways i had never considered. upon return i struggle to comprehend that 5 months have passed, that i missed the summer and all the activities that come with it. i intellectually understand that time has passed, that i had missed out on aspects of people's lives, and yet it all feels the same. or at least strangely familiar.

i wonder if the sense of familiarity is false. is everything around me the same and i am what is unfamiliar? traveling through other countries it was obvious i did not belong and all things were new to me, i was the outsider; unfamiliarity (is that even a word?) was normal. here in my own country i have never felt i fit in but i was comfortable with that, because it was a part of my identity, an aspect of who i was and thus it was familiar. i know how to function in this western world, where to go to purchase a long sleeve shirt, how to find the nearest bank and how to interact with the barista at the coffee shop...but i have forgotten how to say things in English, my heart races as i walk into grocery store and i wonder how to respond in many conversations. i suppose it is not that i do not know things or at least how to do things so much as i second guess myself now. at times i wonder, am i doing or saying it this way because i used to, because it is the best way or because it is something i picked up the last few months?

it is easy here. ok yes of course life can have it´s challenges and horrible things happen, i am not saying that everything is perfect here. what i mean to say is, one could move through life without feeling that they are LIVING. rather one could go through life as if on a conveyor belt, on a continuous, monotonous loop. i am struggling here to find a coherent way to express this thought and the best i can do is say this: there are so many ways in the Western world to distract and distance oneself from people, events, emotions and thoughts; is that living?

...I would like to beg you dear Sir, as well as I can, to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don´t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.

-Rainer Maria Rilke

it is with this in mind that i continue on a few more steps, gasping for cool air and the sight of a blue bird soaring among the trees.

a week in review (aka week one in the states)

1. a customs agent asked if i brought any number of items with me: fruits, veggies, seeds, insects...YES insects! haha, my reply? "oh you have got to be kidding me, i hope not!"

2. wow the changing colors of the leaves, who knew it was fall?!

3. 5+ hour flight without a movie? jeez, in the buses in Mexico i would have at least 2 movies and a couple of episodes of 3 1/2 Men in that amount of time!!

4. walking through the local Fred Meyer's i thought, do we really need so many choices of _____ (fill in the blank with the myriad of items that fill up such stores)?

5. in response to the person who said, "welcome back to civilization"...

well i am not sure how to respond to this as "thank you" would imply that i agree with the "civilization" assessment. i can guess what is meant by the comment, the western world = civilization. forgive my impudence but why is the western world held as the model of civilization? i ask because i wonder, is not knowing your neighbor a sign of civilization? is suing a teacher for disciplining a child in the classroom civilized? are we more civilized because we own cars, computers and cell phones all the while being one of the loneliest societies in the world? are we more civilized because cashiers can rely on a computer to tell them how much change to give me after paying $20 for an item that cost $3.58?

i know how much we have in our country and generally in the western world. i understand that stability and systems/infrastructure set us apart from many countries in the world. i know how lucky we are and how much we have, still i wonder about the view that we are models that others should aspire to. i understand that "civilization" is used to imply a particular sense of advancement, but in my opinion, it was used invidiously and the discriminatory 'we are better or more advanced than them' attitude was not well hidden below the surface.

surely i am more sensitive to this after my travels. admittedly my first week back in the states has been a difficult one. it seems the 'reverse culture shock' is far worse than the 'culture shock' i experienced throughout my trip. thus, statements like the one above have provoked silence rather than dialog; images, experiences, observations and opinions are piling up in my brain but i fear the release of one will cause all to come tumbling out in a torrent of confusion that will not help me to explain or others to understand.

still, this comment (or sentiment perhaps) needed addressing. i only wish the statement had stopped at "welcome back." this is such a lovely phrase, especially after traveling to so many places where i never knew anyone and never saw a familiar face. in the few instances where i saw friends it felt so good to be met at a bus station or hostel and hear the words "welcome!" clearly three simple words have evoked much emotion and thought, leaving me to conclude that i will hold on to the "welcome back" i have received during my travels and upon my return home because these are the important interactions i want to remember and hold onto. the other comments, well those i will let go.

it figures

in almost 5 months i crossed in, out and through 7 countries. during that time i took all manner of transportation all the while with a small day pack and a good-size backpacker pack. it got to a point where they just became a part of me and thus separation from them was kept at a minimum. i was sure at some point my pack would fall off the top of a bus, get taken from under my eye or topple into the water as it sat precariously on the edge of a lancha. never happened. my pack and i were never separated for very long...until i got on an airplane to go home. you have to laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. OF COURSE the most systemized, mechanized and structured of all the modes of transportation i have taken in the past 5 months would lose track of my bag. OF COURSE!!

as it happens it was only lost for a day and we were reunited this morning. welcome to the good 'ol US of A.

final days

Cancun. basically two days left and i will spend them in Cancun. i came a day early because some friends i met a few weeks or was it a month ago are here and it seemed like a good idea to come so we could hang out. i am sure it will be great fun and i am so glad to get some extra time with them. still, we are in Cancun. i think if there is any place on my trip that is going to make me want to get on a plane for the states, this is it.

my lonely planet guidebooks are no longer necessary. the bus rides are over. i am in my last hostel. soon enough i will be stepping on a plane, and then another, and still one more, in order to return home.

one more thing...

an addition to the list below...

i am looking forward to: being in a place where i am not being bitten by unknown insects that seem to know exactly where and when i applied the chemical filled repellant that generally works for about 20 minutes. at one point during the trip i was going to keep a list of all the bugs and types of bites but since i never met a bug-ologist (aka entomologist) i never got to know the names of any of them. so they remain...

the miniscule bug that leaves a welt on you 20 minutes later that doesn´t hurt or itch

the spider that bites at night and leaves little red marks on your skin

the misquito that makes your skin itch just by touching it

the misquito that leaves bites that last for over a month

the spidery-thing that bites you, leave a quarter-size welt that turns to a red dot that leaves you itching for days

the ankle biter- the unknown bug that bites only your ankles and legs

stupid scabies

bastard bed bugs

oh and these are just a few of the ones that are on land...there are more, and there are many more in the water! yep, fairly positive i will not miss any of them. one more reason to be grateful for living in a pollution-filled, over-sanitized, industrialized nation!

by the way, can people build a resistance to bug spray? also, i think companies would make a fortune if they could create an all in one bug repellant-sunblock-skin creme...undoubtedly it would be harmful and lead to some deformity or terminal illness but for the moment it would be worth it! of course i wouldn´t use it because i am against sunblock but it might actually be the way to get me to wear sunblock! haha. actually i am considering wearing sunblock the next few days while at the beach, the staff here at the hostel have started to call me, ´la morena´

things i am looking forward to...

we all do it, at some point the backpacker or traveler or whatever you call yourself (with the exception of `tourist`because that is never ever uttered by our group) begins the list of "oh it will be nice to ____ when i return home." i started doing it about 5 days ago. initially i stopped myself from this line of thinking as i felt i was getting ahead of myself and wanted to be certain i did not miss a moment of the trip. a few days later though it happened again, then again, and since that time it hasn´t really stopped. to be clear, the list is not long. i will share a few items below, along with a bit of an explanation. oh and before i start, there is no order to this list and i have not put on the list "it will be nice to see, talk to and spend time with friends and family" because i think that goes without saying :-)

1. have the ability to drink water from tap, any tap. having clean water that is accessable in your home is a luxury and while there have been stops along the way where i could indeed drink the water, these stops were few and far between.

2. wear other clothing. i have been wearing the same clothing (more or less) for 5 months and while it makes picking out my outfit for the day fairly easy, the state of my clothing and my enthusiasm to wear said clothing diminishes day by day.
*there are 3 exceptions to this however. i will continue to wear my newly purchased flip flips, my pink turtleneck sweater i purchased in Guanajuato because i was "cold" in the 79 degree evening weather, and the skinny jeans with crazy zippers and other such decorative nonsense i purchased for $4 in Guadalajara.
**i know the admission that i own and prefer to wear the last two items will result in streams of mockery and general teasing...go ahead, i would do it to you.

3. go for a run. as a "runner" (not sure why this is in quotes, for some reason i was compelled) 5 months of not running has not only rejuvenated my running spirit but also left me looking forward to the many runs i will be doing in the Oregon rain!

4. not have to constantly consider, "where can i put, hide, store, lock or pack my passport-camera-money-memory cards?"

5. along this same vein, being able to put something down in one room and leave it there knowing it will be there when i get back. unfortunately this may result in my leaving things everywhere just because i can.

6. listening to my music whenever and wherever i want. i once had an IPOD and then i gave it away. the reason is not important because while i listened to it often, i was not able to listen to it as much as i wanted as it was one of those items that just calls out "look at me! i am a foreigner with a shiny object that costs obscene amounts of money in your country, if it is even available in your country!" yeah i just didn´t want to put myself or the would be thief in that position.

7. use my laptop. ok so this is one of those things that i go back and forth about...i am looking forward to my own laptop, with my own programs and music and photos, and to a quick internet connection. on the otherhand i am not looking forward to being unundated with what the online culture deems as "news" as soon as i open my internet browser. yes i know i can change the settings, and indeed i will. but i also know that my love of unlimited information about almost anything that can be accessed within 60 seconds of being online is going to collide with my desire to defend myself from information overload and unwanted distraction.

8. eat sushi, thai, indian, italian and whatever other types of food my little heart desires. this is not to say that i do not enjoy Mexican or Nicaraguan or Honduran or Salvadoran or the food of every other country i have visited. on the contrary, i have enjoyed almost all of the food i have eaten and with the exception of the few days i was "over" rice, i will happily continue eating and probably missing the foods from these countries. it is only that i am looking forward to other types of food. we in the western world have access to a wide variety of foods (be it in markets, restaurants or our own homes) and i am looking forward to tasting them all again.

9. cooking, in a kitchen with spices and dishes and pots and pans and recipe books. granted, many hostels have shared kitchens with pots and pans but they are not always in the best condition or there are only a few. i am looking forward to cooking AND baking AND making some of my favorite things AND attempting to replicate some of my new favorite things!

10. not packing and repacking and repacking and repacking. granted i will not be returning to my own place. but i will be staying in one place for a while, and it will be someone´s home. so, not only can i unpack, i can also hang things up!

that´s all for now folks.

162

hours left in Mexico and left in my trip. yes, it has indeed come down to counting, appreciating and savoring every hour.

Merida, Merida, Merida

oh how i love this city and it´s people. especially those involved in Project Yucatan...i have had a wonderful time spending time with the youth (now young adults) who i met many years ago. it is so good to hear how they are doing, their thoughts for the future and their ideas from day to day. i have missed them and being able to spend hours with them has been one of the best parts of my trip! tomorrow i will go to the village to see more of the young adults and see the changes in the village as well.

it does feel as though my trip is winding down and i find my days are slower and my mindset has altered as well. it is a strange feeling and certainly is odd to be one of the travelers who is speaking of going home. i envy those who are just starting out on their journeys, just as those who are continuing envy my transition home. i do think it is good my final days are in familiar places and with friends, i think it affords me the ability to relax and embrace the time i have left.

ah, because my time is limited, and because the computers in the hostel are slow as molasses, i will not be putting up any other photos until i return home.
hasta luego!

almost last stop

arrived in Merida this afternoon and while it has been a few years since i was last here it feels quite familiar. turns out i am staying at the same hostel i stayed at 4+ years ago...glad to say they have made some changes (all for the better) and that there are many more travelers than there were in the hostel in Campeche (2 including me).

when i find a computer that does not remind me of computers cerca-USA 1990 i will post more and make an attempt to add photos as well. for now i will just say that i am so very happy to be in Merida...not just because i love the city and the outlying areas but because i will get to see the young adults i worked with through Project Yucatan!! to say i am excited and happy is an understatement :-)

want to know more about Project Yucatan...check it out: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=18094534106

saying goodbye...again

many months ago i posted about my trouble saying goodbye to Oaxaca and today i find myself experiencing this feeling all over again. i do truly love this city and am certain that it is because of the people i have met and spent time with while here. there are those of course, whom i will continue to talk with and hopefully see again as they have been a wonderful addition to my already fantastic circle of friends!

tonight i start on what i hope will be my final EPIC bus ride of this trip...there will be other bus rides, that i am sure, but i am hoping this will be the last of the 20+ hour adventures. that being said, i feel rather sure that i would take a 12+ hour bus ride in a first class bus in Mexico over a 1+ hour plane ride to-from anywhere in the USA. sorry but i am just being honest. airport security that takes away my tweezers and water bottle plus the barbie-size seating on the airplane are not easily forgotten or forgiven in my book.

ok then...off to have lunch with my Oaxacan family, followed by nieves with my fellow travelers, and a final walk through the city!

oh for the love of...

i have 17 days left!

oh dios mio.

24 hours in Puebla Mexico

a few photos from the very short but full 24 hours in Puebla.
the cathedral.
around the zocalo.
the train museum...

i always want to be sure to see something new and different...this was the first train museum of the trip!

a new view of Oaxaca

my third time in the state and city of Oaxaca included a weekend outside of the city and in the mountains. beautiful does not begin to describe the landscape and there is no way that a camera can possibly capture the beauty of the area. still, i made feeble attempts and hopefully this gives you a bit of a glimpse of our surroundings.

this is early in the morning our first day at our first stop. we had a bit of breakfast and a short zip line adventure!

next stop, a beautiful view

and a very very long bridge over a very very deep ravine!

later in the day we hiked up up up into the trees...

and through the large rocks that formed the land.

a view from the cabin in the early morning.

Photos from Guadalajara Mexico

i was not in Guadalajara for very long and while i was there i spent more time with new friends than i did taking photos, thus i only have a few to share. the photos are from areas throughout the city including the historic district and one of the parks.

slowing down and taking stock

back in Oaxaca i am sure that this time will be the final visit of this trip. it is bittersweet i suppose as i am catching up with friends and then saying goodbye once again. certainly this city is familiar to me now and the past few days i acted as a guide (and sometimes translator) for one of my newest friends, this one from Slovenia. we actually met in Puebla and upon realizing we were going to the same place decided to travel together. the hostel in Oaxaca has been full so there have been lots of new friends and interesting conversations amongst those of us from all over the world who have one simple thing in common: we are all here now.

i have had the pleasure of meeting many wonderful, funny, interesting people throughout my trip and certainly many of them have been at the hostels. the whole culture of hostels is unique and while each hostel has it´s own "flavor" as a friend of mine would say, the world of hostels is certainly all it´s own. sometimes it kind of feels like you are living in a bubble.

for instance, as i write this, one guy from New Zealand and one guy from England are watching Honey I Shrunk the Kids as they relax after a morning of learning to cook chile relleno, guacamole, tortillas, and tacos dorados. next to me sits a couple from England who are traveling the world in 6 months and a German girl who is here in Oaxaca for a week and is volunteering during the mornings because she feels she needs to do something besides "see pretty buildings and old ruins." the owner of the hostel is from the state of Washington who after traveling for about a year returned to the states and quickly realized he wanted something different. a friend told him that this hostel was for sale so he bought it 5 months ago. the hostel provides breakfast, free internet, open kitchen, hot water showers, book exchange and a tv for use throughout the day-night. i could feasibly stay here all day and hang out, read, write, eat, chat with others and never really know i was in another country much less oaxaca. it is a strange little world.

and in this hostel world after 4 months traveling i have moved up in the hierarchy of travelers. yes there is a sort of weird hierarchy which is loosely based on how long you have traveled, and where you have traveled. being a girl who is traveling alone adds a little something and it appears at this point that i have some sort of clout. it is a funny thing and certainly is a contradiction since the moment i walk out the door into the oaxacan neighborhood i am just a tourist...a gringa.

as a gringa i walk a fine line between accepted tourist and annoying outsider. this too is a funny thing to manage and one that is only better managed when you accept that you are somewhat untouchable but on the outside, in your own alternate universe and no matter how much you may try or no matter how much you may want to be a part of the culture of where you are, you will always be "different" and may never be "a local"... i have had many conversations with travelers, ex-pats, volunteers, and residents (locals) about this and other related topics and it is enough sometimes to make me wonder: how is we all get along, much less live with, each other?

but that i suppose is question better left for the philosophers.

spa day in Sayulita

hiking, swimming, discovering a sacred site...just another day in Sayulita.

here are a few photos:

and if you want to see more photos, check out this blog: http://www.romansinmexico.blogspot.com/

where am i?

i had that moment again. it is the moment when i look around and do not know where i am. the one where i must search my brain and all the items around me to get some indication of where in the spanish-speaking world i may be currently standing. it happened once when i turned a corner, it happened again when i walked out of a coffee shop, and it happened this morning as i stood in a bus terminal. the thing about bus terminals is that they usually do not say where you are but have lots of buses going to many other places so process of elimination is out of the question. so i have learned to just wait and then the moment comes when i remember, "oh right i am in Mexico City and i need to get the bus to Puebla."

i got the bus and arrived in the lovely town of Puebla. upon setting my things down in the dorm at the hostel i turned to see a friend i made in Mexico City. it is always fun running into people and we spent the rest of the day exploring the city and catching up. tomorrow i will have the morning to enjoy a bit more of Puebla before heading back to the state of Oaxaca where i will hopefully catch up with more friends and explore more of the state.

oh a quick update for those who care...
1. my wardrobe is quickly dwindling and it is not because i am buying my dearest family and friends beautiful gifts. rather it seems that clothing you wear every other day that is not-washed, handwashed and then randomly washed in questionable washers-dryers does not add to the longevity...if you start to notice me wearing the same things in photos it is because I AM WEARING THE SAME THING EVERY OTHER DAY!
2. remember that cough-sore throat-lose my voice in the morning thing...yeah it never really went away. i have decided the culprit is the constant climate changes...88 degrees with 150% humidity for 4 days and 70 degrees with 40% humidity for 3 days, etc. not complaining though because if this is the downside of my current lifestyle i will take it.
3. is hearing some complaints from my devoted readers...i am not writing enough, i am skipping the "good stuff," and i am getting "too serious." umm...ok let me see if i can come up with a clear response...have we met?! haha good try good friends but there is no way i am sharing some stories with the world. AND dear friends, if you and my family have not been able to keep me from being "too serious" then traveling alone through central america and mexico for 5 months probably is not going to do it either. as for the writing, it is true i am not posting enough. i am writing though. posting no, writing yes. still i take your complaints seriously (hahaha) and will work a bit harder in the future :-)
4. best way to cure a fear of drowning? continued attempts at surfing. this last one was fun and provided some quality moments of panic. yep the motivation to surf is fueled mainly by the desire to get over this rational but annoying fear.

friends in foreign countries are awesome!

ok so this part of the trip is where i see people i know and the timing couldn't be better! i have been in Sayulita (in the state of Nayarit) Mexico for the past few days staying with friends. it has been great fun, quite relaxing and i have been ridiculously spoiled...which is why i must leave. i fear if i don't leave now the laughs, conversation, carrot cake, crazy cats, beautiful pool and overall wonderfulness of friends might just keep me here forever.

tomorrow i am off to a new destination although at this moment it is not clear where...pictures to come (as i say with almost every post) and stories to share next time!

catching up on a few things...mexico city

while in Mexico City i was able to see some incredible art and my favorite was that of Frida Kahlo and Diego Rivera. the blue house (casa azul) where Frida grew up also lived as an adult is now a museum. the next day i went to the national palace that holds some of the famous murals of mexican history by Diego. here are a few photos from those days...

kids are kids everywhere

three examples i must share of how kids are just kids no matter where they are...

at the National Palace in Mexico City, walking through the presidental sections (office, dining rooms, etc.) and as we are in the hall of presidents where the portraits of presidents past are hung i overhear a young man, probably 14 or 15 say (in spanish of course) to no one in particular,
" blah blah blah dead presidents...blah blah blah. when do we get to the good stuff?!"

a few days later i was at a cafe where a mother and her 5 or 6 year old daughter were sitting waiting for their order of food to take home. the little girl was in a pink leotard, pink tights and sandals and her mother was carrying a small backpack and a pair of ballet slippers. as they waited they had the following exchange:
mother: "come here and put on your skirt and shirt"
girl: "i cant"
mother: "what do you mean you cant?!"
girl: "because then i wont be a ballerina anymore!"

and then there was this exchange between two siblings (boy probably 12 years and girl probably 9 or 10) at the market.
boy: "why dont you ever listen to me?"
girl: "i listen"
boy: "but you dont do what i say. i am older you know."
girl: "yes but that doesnt make you smarter."

somethings just cross all cultures!

phots from Guanajuato

Welcome!

this is from the top of the steps as i walked down to the hostel...it is a city of stairs, and tiny, narrow streets.

some of the streets.

this is from one of the parks looking at the Juarez theatre.

this is another view of the same park.

one of the many churches...what amazed me at the moment i took this was the blue sky and the bright yellow.

new places are generally a good thing

i left Queretaro feeling...well check the previous post and you may get a sense...i arrived in Guanajuato rather apprehensive but hopeful nonetheless. what i found is a perfectly lovely place and 2 people who i swear were put in my path because i needed exactly what they had to offer and say.

this city is ridiculously beautiful and has this sort of Spanish-European-Mexican feel that just makes you want to laugh because it is just the right mix. of course charming cobblestone streets, incredible architecture and the bluest of blue skies are not enough for me anymore...at least not enough to make me say, wow this is a fabulous city! it is the people, the history, the culture...the history here is deep and the pride in the city and the history is strong. the people are friendly, open and hard-working from what i can tell and from what i have gathered from the Senora at my hostel. which by the way is the BEST of the whole trip. hands down the best. ok back the the Senora who made me a yummy mexican breakfast and talked with me for 2.5 hours this morning about...well everything. she has lots of thoughts, opinions, experiences and questions and was open to sharing them all. it was enough to make me consider staying in town for another day just so i would have more time to talk with her...

the other person who was thrown in my path was The Photographer (everyone has alternate identities on my blog if you haven´t figured that out so far). born and raised in Queretaro to a mexican mother and italian father, he was spending the day in Guanajuata taking stock photos. initially, thinking i was french (laughable i know!) he spoke to me in french, when i responded in spanish we spent the next 5 minutes conversing in spanish before he asked me where i was from and then the language switched to english. for the next few hours we walked through the city as he gave me a impromtu tour interrupted only by coffee breaks and the expected photo op.

in this new place i was afforded the opportunity to meet people who were open and willing to share their time, thoughts, experiences with me just when i needed their presence. there are times when talking with other travelers and-or tourists (there is actually a difference) just isn´t enough or isn´t quite what you are needing. times when you have questions about the culture, history or even just life...or maybe it isn´t just when you have questions so much as you are hoping to meet someone who shows you that in this big world there are people who ask the same questions as you and may or may not have the same answers.

i have been thinking a lot about cultural differences and similarities. having time with these two people allowed me the space to ask some of my questions but more importantly i was pushed to listen and consider not just the words that were said but the meaning and the emotion.

tomorrow i will move on, Guadalajara is next, who knows what i will find or what will find me there.

Queretaro Mexico

ok so i am going to probably going to confuse matters by posting photos from the past, writing overviews and reflections from the trip, and now posting about my present location and experience...it seems fitting that everything is all jumbled, it is how i feel at the moment.

here i am in this sweet colonial town with it's strong Spanish influence and important place in Mexican history and i am just wandering. i arrived yesterday afternoon, am here all day today and leave tomorrow for...well that has yet to be determined, Guanajuato or Guadalajara i suppose. anyway, it is a beautiful town, the kind all tourists to Mexico want to see with lovely colors and incredible architecture, small little streets that wind into fountains and ornate churches, and vendors selling art and textiles and fresh fruit and sweet candies.

and i wonder, "what am i doing here?"

i stop in the churches, walk down the streets, eat fresh mango as i sit in one of the many parks, drink strong coffee with the locals at the plaza, visit a museum, and take photos of the statues or streets or churches or whatever else seems to call out, "i am Queretaro!"

all the while there is this dumb song playing in my head...

smile, though your heart is aching

smile, even though it's breaking

when there are clouds in the sky

you'll get by...

if you smile
with your fear and sorrow

smile and maybe tomorrow

you'll find that life is still worthwhile

if you just...

light up your face with gladness

hide every trace of sadness

although a tear may be ever so near

that's the time you must keep on trying

smile, what's the use of crying

you'll find that life is still worthwhile

if you just... smile

i think it is just one of those days. just goes to show no matter where you are or what you are doing, you can have just one of those days.

catching up on photos

these are from my final days in Nicaragua...went to Chinandega and over to the beach, it was a fabulous afternoon and evening!a short bus ride northeast of Leon is the little town of San Jacinto. there you will find small but very hot springs with boiling mud and lots of steam. we had the best tour guide, all of 10 years old with a little sweetness and a lot of sass. of course i loved her!
Laguna de Apoyo, a 48 kilometer (yes i have to the metric system!) body of water inside the crater of the Apoyo volcano. We were there for a few wonderful days enjoying this view, swimming, kayaking, drinking coffee, lounging in a hammock and enjoying the stars...it was perfect!
A few days later we were off to Esteli in the north central highlands of Nicaragua. if you didn't know i love art and murals and street art...so i loved Esteli, there were murals everywhere!

The city and region is best known as being the one of the largest pro-Sandinista areas in the north (the photo is from the mothers of heroes and martyrs museum which is dedicated to those that fought in the revolution), as a producer of coffee, and...

a producer of cigars! did you know that the area is perfect for growing tobacco and after the Cuban revolution it became a haven for cuban cigar makers? i didn't. so of course we went on a tour of a cigar factory. i only wish a camera could capture the smell, strong and if you like cigars well you would be in heaven!

Next and last stop in Nicaragua, the very small and very quiet town of Somoto. The sole purpose of the visit to this place, to hike in and around the canyon.

it turns out you get to swim-float and ride a few rapids as well!!

the canyon adventure was better than expected and i would certainly recommend a visit. oh but if you go, bring your own coffee and your own coffee maker!!

the reflection begins

i didn´t realize it when planning this trip, but i now see that Mexico has been the perfect place to begin and end this trip. to start, it was a great way to ease back into the language and aid in my transition into the backpacking life. to end, it is nice to come to a country with which i am relatively comfortable, to places and people that are familiar, and still have new experiences awaiting me.

throughout my trip i have made attempts to understand and put some meaning behind all i have seen and experienced, but this has proven to be rather confounding. each country, each city, each person has offered me more to think about and added question upon question...leaving me with the feeling that i understand less than when i started.

yet i know that statement and that sentiment is not quite accurate. so it is now, while on the 6-8-12-14 hour bus rides ahead of me, while walking through the streets of familiar cities, while talking with friends and fellow travelers, while writing, that i will make the effort to reflect upon this journey without searching for "the" meaning, or expecting "greater" understanding. rather, the time will be spent remembering the experiences of each moment and how to possibly integrate the last few months into my life and my understanding of myself and the world i live in.

of course this is all very egotistical of me, which is something i have grown to understand about this entire trip. it is a selfish act, to take time to travel alone without work, without responsibilities and in lands far off from friends, family, community and country. it is a luxury not afforded to most and certainly incomprehensible to many. some have said i am incredibly lucky to have the support of my community and culture, others have said this trip is proof that the Western world has veered too much toward the external, and still others have refused to call this trip anything other than a grand vacation. all have elements of truth and yet there is more to be said and that is what i am hoping time will afford me...

Looking back...Copan Ruins (Honduras)

ruins, ruins and more ruins. it seems i just don´t get tired of them. today i went to Teotihuacan, but that is a story for another day. these photos are a few weeks old and i am way behind on the photos for the blog. however, i am in Mexico City where internet connections are fast when you can find an internet location that is! this one i found is on a side street and you have to walk through the first floor, up the stairs to a small room, it´s the 3rd door on the left!







we have internet access at the hostel, but you are not allowed to connect anything to the computers and there are 2 computers for everyone. this means we are limited to 20 minutes at a time. the hostel is huge by the way, probably the biggest i have been in since Panama, and it is in the perfect location, 1 block from the famed Cathedral and zocalo. curious about the hostel, check out the website, http://www.mexicocityhostel.com/



Anyway, back to Copan, the birds greeted us at the entrance and it was hard not to take a photo of them as there were so many of them!





i will let the rest of the photos speak for themselves. enjoy!